Sharing the holidays with your new family

As two become one, it is important that everyone understands there will be many changes to the holidays. Compromises will need to be made on both sides. You will need to establish parameters as to how you will share the various holidays throughout the year. You are establishing your own family now, so you will need to merge two sets of traditions. Here are some suggestions on how to do that:

• Explain and talk about each of your family traditions with each other.
• Each of you pick one of your favorite traditions and implement that into your new family traditions. (For Example; a favorite holiday meal that you always had while growing up.)
• Determine where the main differences are and come to a mutual agreement about how you will handle it. (For Example, do you take turns opening presents or does everyone open at the same time, or do you wrap Santa presents or not?)
• Take turns compromising and you will find that that two traditions will merge together nicely into new family traditions.
• Remember that you are a family of your own now. Others need to have respect for that.

Some helpful suggestions for keeping peace and harmony during the holidays:

• Alternate holidays at each family's house.
• Spend Christmas Eve with one family and Christmas Day with the other family.
• Host the holidays yourself and invite both sides.
• Spend the actual holiday with one family and the next weekend with the other (alternate each year)
• If you have to travel to see one side or the other, alternate years visiting for Thanksgiving one year and Christmas the next.
• Try to have respect for each family's traditions and appreciate the differences.

The holidays can be stressful enough without adding to it with conflict of how to handle differences. Discuss it ahead of time and start your own traditions. Most of all relax and enjoy each other. Happy Holidays to you and your families.

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